Fantasy versus Reality

I have just had the most amazing opportunity bestowed to me and my husband Cary by our family. My mother blessed us with peace of mind to look after our children while we went away, meanwhile my beloved sister with the help of her friend made it possible for us to get all the way to Cape Town, South Africa, otherwise this would have never happened.


It was eight months or more in the planning. Would it work, wouldn't it work? Would all the elements come together for us to actually go all the way from Los Angeles to Cape Town? Well the answer is yes. And boy did it work. Just prior to the trip not even a blown up fridge, a stolen car and an impending cabin crew strike could deter us from continuing ahead with our plans. It was meant to be.

We set off from Los Angeles and went through London with something of a Motley Crew in tow. An OCD mechanic, an overstressed working mother of three, a bohemian manager, an efficient agent, a happy go lucky (except in the morning) call center supervisor. In London we collected an Internet Entrepeneur and a smiley, sunny plastic surgeon and off to Cape Town we went. All equally ready for a sunny vacation.

The fantasy was to arrive to glorious weather, a beach front accommodation adjacent to a potentially finished hotel. What we arrived to was a one hour car hire process, followed by a 15 minute walk with luggage to collect the car. Upon arriving at said accommodation, while the view was everything we had hoped and dreamed, the reality was that the adjacent construction site (clearly not even halfway done) was a bit of a let down. But regardless, we were in Cape Town and about to see our family after 5 long years.

In the fantasy we would timely surprise each family member individually with tears and laughter. The reality was that after 40 minutes of traffic and driving by the house, to find mother in law and niece in the driveway, we were just relieved to get out the car.

Surprised, she was. Women are always naturally more emotional than men but to see my mother in law running in a circle on the front lawn was quite something.

In the fantasy, my father in law would come home from work to find us in the lounge and be excited to see us. The reality was that Cary walked in on him stark naked in the shower and for the next 20 minutes he retreated in and out of his bedroom in some type of delayed state of shock.

The laughter and tears we receive from Cary's brother and sister-in-law are always what we are hoping for. As we have become adults I think the four of us understand the challenges we face as young married couples and parents and I believe they truly comprehend and appreciated when they realized we had come all the way to see them, what it means and what it takes to leave our children.

Meeting our nieces Hannah and Emma was a joy I can only compare closely with the love I have for my own children. To see my daughters blood relatives and appreciate their differences and similarities is something that was worth every mile travelled. Here the reality far surpassed the fantasy.

So after the surprises were over, what else do you do in South Africa except light a fire and have a braai. Lucky for us, Chad had already started this process when he had been called to his mothers house to fictitiously pick up Emma.

And so we began to Braai and the wine, beer, vodka and brandy flowed. Our crew were extremely patient and understanding, enduring hours of high decibal yelling as the Keown and Abrahamse family were clearly together and loud is their middle name.

In the fantasy, we will have a great time, get home, sleep in the next morning and venture off somewhere. The reality was that while we managed to rally to the waterfront, Cary played it safe, stayed home and nursed his bad hangover. There I knew the reality was he was never going anywhere the next day.... to be continued.....